What I Do.
Bartender. Manager. Satellite god. Bouncer. Barback. Psychiatrist. Mediator. Comic. Dishwasher. The list is endless. Lifer. The restaurant/bar Industry is not for everyone. Have seen hundreds of people come and go, some rise above it and start their own business! Others have committed suicide. It's what happens and alcohol affects everyone differently, so you watch, learn people's habits, limits. Your customers are your friends. And you want them back, over and over, as "regulars" and a "following" are a strong part of the business, just as much as atmosphere, customers, specials, and the old locale itself. I got involved in this business in 1975 in Corpus Christi, Texas where I'm from, in 1974 at the age of 15 working at a place under the Wilson Tower named Charboy. The owner, Sue, looked like Manual Noreiga, that is a pineapple face scarred by acne, and boy, she would work your ass off for that $1.75 a hour: fry cook, busboy, janitor and dishwasher. I lasted maybe 2 months. At a place named Burger Chef, we used to work until midnight and then have to clock out. Then sometimes work...for free....until 1-3 am, and yes, then go home and get up to go to school at 7:00am and be in class at 8:00am. Some classes sleep thru but that is what you do.
The names of the places fade with time: Mai Tai; Crystal Confectionary; Wolfies; Foxys; Gabs; NJ's Saloon; Sams' Place on Richmond; Dirtys; Willie G's; Scoreboard Sports Bar; Nick's; Ron's Pub; Scorecard; there are probably some I have forgotten in there I'm sure. Some I worked at for years like Scoreboard (9 years under 3 owners) and Dirty's of Houston (6 years under 2 owners) for instance. Some had such screwed up systems like Willie G's I worked, then said no thanks; don't need job that bad.
It is hard to get "the perfect crew" in this business and when you find them....you keep them. This business is really nomadic, so unusual to see people stay at one place for X amount of time. But that is part of the business. And if you have a good, solid crew, most times your business will be around for many years and be successful. I do not know what the failure ratio is of start ups in Houston, but it is probably high.
A lot of AMC fans have stopped by the various places I have worked at thru the years in Houston, (since 1983) and of course, they usually get a meal or a few beers out of the deal and great to put a face with a email, name, phone voice you know.
There are thousands of stories I could easily make this the biggest file on my website, after all you don't do something for decades and not have staying power if not successful doing it. Think about that for a moment. Over 30 years. Paige, my wife of almost 20 years has often said why don't I open my own place. Maybe in time I will, God knows I know enough people in this business from reps, distributors, customer base could do it easily. We will see. The hours are long, and many people not familiar with this business don't realize that. Sometimes for instance you walk 15-20 miles in one 8 hour shift. And there are lifting 160lb kegs, sorting and managing egos, maybe manager or owner has narcotic or drinking problem you deal with, so it is not for everyone. Many places don't have health care and some places will pay you flat salary (in 2007, it is legal under Texas law) only $2.18 a hour because you are a tipped employee. I don't know too many people who will work for $2.18 a hour, even if you walk with $100 tips a shift.
Is it a fun job? Of course it is. Each place is unique as the people who own it, or work there. And my own success (at least this is the way I have treated a shift) has been no matter what shitty type of day you have had, when you step behind the bar it is SHOWTIME and people pay to see you perform! You have a smile on your face, and make them feel welcome and insure they have a good time. I have been directly involved in, and volunteered (just like in the AMC Hobby) hundreds, if not thousands of hours of my time for causes such as benefits. Could be a fellow bartender, waitress sick or had accident (and most places don't have insurance, you are on your own) so a benefit is held to try to cover medical or other expenses. There have been times it has been for Houston Police officer or firefighter injured or killed in line of duty, silent auctions, bar-b-que benefits, rallies, sports memorabilia, you name it....I have volunteered.
Like the AMC hobby, you are never going to make everyone happy either, so the ones you make happy, they return over and over and over. The ones you don't screw them and their miserable lives, they will go to their graves pissed off about the weather, Don Imus, their team loses in Finals, or crappy season or even ugly team mascot. So again, you only try.
With that comment, I want to quickly point out that 95% of my website is FREE TO THE PUBLIC. That is right, none of the 100% VENDORS on my list have ever paid me a dime since 1990; the AMC CLASSIFIEDS is a pain in the ass to keep up; the SUADs have taken on a life of it's own; and I have helped well over 500+ people find a AMC...and never taken a dime as payment. The LINKS with dozens of chapters; the Registries; photos; all PRODUCTION/TECH; yes is all free to public and put up by me thru the years.
I don't give a rat's ass if I
sell you anything and don't care if you like it or not (yes, you Donald non potty
mouth')
The site is intended to help others, which is much more than I can say for a
number of folks out there who are clueless and are on the rag so often they
should have bled to death.
How many other AMC-related sites do you know of that are totally, or almost
totally free? No wonder my website counters spin off the hook. Good! And like a
customer at the bar......everyone is welcome until they might become a asshole!
Then they are cut off & removed from premises.
So here is a number of photos from my career in the Houston Bar business. This is only a fraction of them, there are hundreds, many with sports stars (I primarily work sports bars) but figured some of you would have a great laugh at some of these photos. Yes, some of these places are tiddie bars. Don't be a hypocrite, you have probably been to one. And don't get pissed off, drunk and kick dog and beat wife, you probably drink too. Just don't drink and drive please.
If our paths cross, even if you are Mitchell, or Ebay Asshole, AMC Asshole, Nigerian Asshole (ok, scratch the Nigerian Asshole, well, don't really scratch it, but they never use real names anyhows) so even if good AMCer or one of the above, I'll buy your first round. So with that said, here are a few photo thru the decades of a ongoing, fun & lifelong career.
Rock Alive, Corpus Christi, Texas 1981
I got laid so much at this place I was keeping a dairy. Sort of like Clinton kept stained dresses. There were women trying to crawl into my front window to get in bed with me (true story!) of which then I would have to give their drunk ass a ride home at 4:00am. We also did wet tshirt contest at this place. Many beautiful women in Corpus Christi in early 80s.
Rock Alive, Corpus Christi, Texas 1981
While I am posing for photo here and trying to get laid, note in the background customers waiting for drinks. That's the old ticket, make them wait if they don't tip. It might be the reason I had two dollars in my damned tip jar if you look close. Quit trying to impress the tiddie dancer, see if she will come back at 2:30am when bar is closed and paperwork all done. Chances are she won't as she would have found someone else, not good looking like me here, but someone who had more than $2 in tip jar.
Rock Alive, Corpus Christi, Texas 1981
The above place
was really memorable; I got to meet many top Rock & Roll acts and still have
photos, autographs of many including Styx; Head East and the all female band
Vixen, of which I have a huge cloth signed poster of the original member. This
is one of my favorite photos however, simply because when you 'break into' this
business, you never know if you will last thru the next shift. That was
9490 days ago. A mentor, rodney Page is off to the side of the photo
with white sleeve. A big imposing fellow of 6'6" and a great big friendly
fellow who always made people feel....welcome. My barback, Ed Vance with black
sleeve is also slightly shown; later all three of use would end up in Houston
where there was more money...and a lot more work. Rodney would help me get on at
GABS, and also NJ's which his mom owned; Ed would end up at a dream job at
Rockers on the west side.
Foxy's Strip Club, Corpus Christi, Texas 1982
Foxy's, like Wolfie's, were both Bandido run and owned places. Good group of hard working bikers I may add; I wonder if Grandpa is still around riding his Harley. Sometimes the manager would lock the doors and select customers would get to sit in the 'pervert pit' and the girls would dance totally nude. Uncommon then, but you can find many 'gentleman's clubs' in Houston that do this now.
Gab's Country Western Bar, Houston, Texas, 1983
Shown with Lavonne the manager. This place had so much drugs flowing thru it sometimes it probably would exceed register sales. The TABC busted it a few times, one night I, along with the whole crew and manager, were jailed for 'serving drunks' while 26 customers took the ride downtown in Houston Police vans. One guy arrested for 'public intoxication' only drank Artesia water. My charges, along with almost all crew, were eventually dropped by the DA. All charges were dropped against customers. This was TABC's way then...and now, of 'leaning' on a establishment that has problems, whether serving minors, or drugs, or after hours! Quite a lesson! Made some serius money at this place I may add, although country music sucks, I tolerated it and even cut my hair. Memorable moment: some drunk cowboy came up to me and said "I Don't Like You!!!" and I snapped "I Don't Like Me Either!!!" and you have never seen such a catatonic lost look on one's face like his.
Sam's Place Richmond Avenue, Houston, Texas, 1983
Sam's was one of
four companies: Mexican Joes, Cattleguard Downtown, and Roadhouse on 6 were the
others. I was picking up shifts at both Sams and Cattleguard at the time. Sams
had the HIGHEST VOLUME OF LIQUOR SALES IN TEXAS at this time, and it was non
stop...and profitable. Cattleguard had the second longest bar in Houston, of
course the logest being the ASTRODOME BAR in the Dome! When you got off a shift
at either Sams or Cattleguard, your legs were like rocks from running ass off.
No I didn't dress like this, just thought it was funny Spock photo to put up.
Dirtys, Houston, Texas 1983
I am not sure where
this place above is/was, could be Sams, could be Cattleguard, could be one of
the many places I was a 'hired gun' at the time. Obviously Reagan was president
at the time however, and this was a hastily put together Halloween costume. I
also voted for Reagan, just figured the controversy some might comment on the
outfit though, but never happened and as usual, tips were great on working
Halloween.
Dirty's of Houston, Texas, 1984 (?)
Dirty's took the name....and concept...from the well known Dixie Chicken in College Station, home of Texas A&M. I left Sams/Cattleguard reluctantly as that was part time, and the manager promised me full time. Best thing about it was the food, the chicken fried steak was bigger than a frisbee, and I didn't have to pool tips or tip barback, I just busted my ass doing it all. There was a really good crew here also. This was e early 'sports bar' concept in 1984. The celebrities you met were fellow Houstonians like Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top, Charley Kerfield who would come in, eat a chicken fried steak, then go pitch a few hours later for Astros. This place started out clean and we trashed it, the customers trashed it. 95% of the shit you see on the walls is mine, and pretty soon I was taking photos of customers and stapling them to the walls. Great concept and they would come back year after year. I may add this place also had butcher's paper on table and crayons, and adults and kids alike 'tagged' the walls, ceiling, anyplace there was to write, it got written on.
Dirty's of Houston, Texas, 1985/86
This was one of the closest
knit crews I have ever had the pleasure of working with. Amazingly I can still
name almost all of them in this photo. Left to right: Pat, Patty, Craig on back
with phone (and probably sneaking a Stoli Kazi) Billy, the little blonde I don't
remember her name but she answered to 'ho' me in back, (and she also had some
choice names for me) Scooter the manager, Tammy (this is my ex girlfriend, I
hope she is doing well) and I don't remember the girl on far right. Note photos
on wall, I was spending my own money to plaster the place with these, but it all
came back in tips.
Dirty of Houston, Texas, circa 1986
Dirty's got us new
uniforms but I ain't the most color coordinated person around either. This shows
what happens when fashion explodes. Note the sign in back "pit bull with
aids on board" and off to right of my beautiful pimpin hat is a rubber
chicken with a bowling pin stuck up it's ass. This made people order buffalo
wings. No.....I DO NOT DRINK behind the bar. And to this day, I STILL DO NOT.
You buy me a shot, I will have it at the end of my shift!
Dirty's of Houston, circa 1987
Potty mouth my ass,
here I got something for your butt here. Note "have you hugged your
bartender today' sticker; also 'if you are Polish, smile' (this was for our
manager, Billy Kubiak, who is brother/cousin of Coach Kubiak of the Houston
Texans in 2007!) and also decals of "Love Those Oilers' and"Houston
Gamblers" in background!
Dirty's of Houston, Texas, circa 1988
Paige used to come in
and I would look at her ass when she would play pinball. She was 23....I was
29....however, my GIRLFRIEND worked here, so didn't look at Paige's ass too
much. Ok, I did. LIAR! I could say I really liked her for her pinball skills, as
she is a damned good pinball player. My mother Sarah Marie DeAlcala Stakes died
Jan 30th, 1988, and I was one screwed up individual when mom died; who had been
battling cancer for 6 years. Paige was a good listener and seemed to be there at
a really fucked up time in my life. She STILL is and as we head into almost 20
years together, we have 2 kids and have had something like 200 AMCs have owned
since then. She still has a cute ass, but it is hard to find some good pinball
machines nowadays as it is mostly video games at pool halls and arcades. The
photo above shows her whipping up on vintage pinball game COMET. The crane game
just to the left, the employees used to tilt at a 45 degree angle and all the
stuffed animals fall out which would piss off Irv, the guy who put all the plush
toys in there, he could not figure out how the machine only made $20 and $100's
of dollars of stuff toys were "won".
Dirty's of Houston, Texas, circa 1989
Pinball. I will kick
your ass. I have 3 Texas titles and one City title. Not that they mean anything,
but bragging rights. This is me whipping up Pinbot. I would run it up to some
ungodly amount of free games then walk away. We are talking BILLIONS, not
millions, of points. At Mama's Cafe on Westheimer, some dumbass who used to play
daily there and had high score of 15 MILLION; and was shooting his mouth off to
drunk buddies. I challenged him and told him I would spot him a million a ball;
free balls count as same play ball; $1500 per ball. He thought I was full of
shit, but said sure. Not that he had the money, but I had a backer anyways.
After 2 hours of me playing I had over 87 million and was headed towards 100
million, still on first ball with about 7 stacked up. He didn't get to play. I
told him he had been set up by the guy who owned the machine. No money exchanged
hands, and I simply threw the game, left my initials of EDX on the machine, and
had a few beers and left. So yes, I will kick your ass in pinball
earthling.....and have been playing since 4. Also won a pinball contest at
Confetti's here in Houston, BLINDFOLDED....and got FREE TICKETS to The Who
concert!
Grif's Inn, Houston, Texas, year unknown
This little
sweetheart I watched grow up from about 6 years old. Her and dad used to come
into Dirty's, and when I left there, followed me down to Grif's. As mentioned
way above, a bartender develops a following. I am humbled and honored by the
following of people I have known thru the decades who have followed me like a
dog in heat from place to place. She sure did turn out to be a beautiful lady!
Grif's Inn, Houston, Texas, circa 1990/1991
Grif's Inn used to
have bus trips to the Astrodome each home game. Most people were drunk before
the bus got there, but it was fun, and we all sat together, and made the loudest
amount of noise. Grif is the only person I have ever seen to start a WAVE in the
Astrodome. Repeatedly. Grif's Oiler Army was legendary in their support of the
Oilers, and many players would come by Grif's in return...needless to say
anytime there was a sports story in Houston......this is where all the stations
were. It only seats about 50 people I may add, but has a big patio behind it
next to the huge nest of spies Chinese Embassy. Grif's has been around since
1960s. If you are ever in Houston, you NEED to stop in this little place for a
pint. That is Angele Sinclaire I'm holding up; she was Grif's entry into the St.
Patricks Day float contest, and was Queen of the huge St. Patrick's Day Parade
here in Houston several times, really beautiful lady. I almost forgot to add
that the Saint Patrick's day Grif's Party is also lengendary, dozens of bands,
tents filled with Irish food and drink, from sunup to early AM....
Grif's Inn, Houston, Texas, circa 1991
A crew shot of Torie,
who I believe was 18 at the time (Torie, don't be drinking behind the bar and
uh, well, don't be drinking as you were not 21 yet!) Jerry "Coach"
AuFrance who could make some of the best burgers I have ever ate, even after
10-15 Budweisers this guy could COOK; me and Dee Dee on the right. Dee Dee was
one of the most creative people I have ever seen in a kitchen with limited
resources; amazing what she could turn out for lunch specials given limited
items to cook! Dee Dee is my favorite albino Irish woman. At least she used to
say she was Irish, but at Grif's EVERYONE WAS IRISH except the British National
Soccer Team.
Grif's Inn, Houston, Texas, circa 1991/92
Paige used to come
visit me here because we had Miller Lite on tap. She also made a who lot of
friends at this place, many of whom she still stays in contact with after all
these years like manager Helen and her hubby Duke. This is a photo of me taking
a Breathalyzer Check on her. This intricate test is
still performed by me after almost 20 years.
Scoreboard Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, 1994
I made a bet. Houston
was down 3-1 in the Western Conference Finals to Charles Barkley's Phoenix Suns
who he proclaimed "Butt Kicking Inc is doing good" Of course the Suns
didn't have Hakeem Olajuwon. I made the comment to several of my customers who
were regulars....and doctors.....that Houston was DONE and if they came back to
win the series I would shave my head. One said "I'll take some of
that" and the other said they would too. So $400 per doc is $1200, and I
would shave my head and get $400 if Houston WON the Series. They came back and
won the damned thing (and went on to win the Championship) and I had to shave my
head. I look like Shawn Kemp's ass with no hair. The late Monique Nation of Fox
26 came and and covered me getting my long mane severed....and I donated the
$1200 to charity. That's my artwork on the windows and doors behind me, clearly
seen from Interstate 10 whihc is across the street about 50 years, and has a
estimated 248,000 cars pass this place daily!
Scoreboard Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, circa 1994/95
That is legendary Houston anchor Don Kobos fixing to give me a set of 4 Chicago Bulls vs Houston Rockets tickets at Scoreboard, where I was on duty. Part of the "job" is knowing media types like this. And I knew a shitload of them. And would call them whenever a 'big sports story' broke, and needless to say, they would come out, interview people (including me, duh!) and others. You give them a few free drink cards or comp their crew some burgers, and then get on tv. Real simple. And the sheer exposure of it is priceless....which in turn people would see "Scoreboard Sports Bar" in the news...then come out to check out the club. Priceless. Yes, I'm a ham for the camera and don't use the F word on camera however.
Scoreboard Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, 1994
The Scoreboard went nuts when the Rockets beat Knicks. We lost 4 tables, one big screen had a bottle go thru it, numerous ceiling tiles, but what do you expect as our seating capacity was 350 and we had over 700 stuffed in there. Anyplace in Houston with a tv screen had a crowd. We had about 50 screens. Tom, on the right was a manager. Hardcoare, but long suffering, Dallas Cowboys fan. Tom used to make a lot of money betting people he could drink a pitches of beer in under 15 seconds. $10-$50 and amazing how many people took him up on it just to have him take their money. Unfortunately then for rest of shift me and crew had to babysit drunk Tom. He's a good guy who moved up to Dallas somewhere, have not seen him since mid 1990s so hope he is doing well with all coaching changes and drug charges the Cowboys seen to have! Tom if you are reading this: DALLAS STILL SUCKS!
Birthday Present from customer, year unknown
So you have booze,
drugs, gambling, crawfish, food, sports, pinball (not at all locations, guess
could be same for crawfish!) tiddie dancers, eh, ok, also not at all locations;
whether they work there or come in as customers. Still, your customers
appreciate the fine job you do day in and out. And I appreciate their different
ways of showing it; as any waitress or bartender can tell you...it can be
extremely profitable pulling a shift on your own birthday. This was a birthday
gift one year. Her name is Jasmine. I know, they are all named Jasmine at the
strip clubs. This one was brought in to the place I was working and put on quite
a show for 15 minutes. I was really impressed at a cheerleader like spin and
roll move she did from 10 feet away, whereas she ended up with her legs on
either side of my head, and I was staring at the old tuna helper. What is that
delectable fragrance? Is it Jasmine or Apricot Massengill?
Scoreboard Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, circa 2000
At least I think this was the Scoreboard, might have now been changed to Scorecard. I would be a rich man if I called Immigration on Alex shown here and his relatives and got say, $1 a person for turning them in. Damn he has a large familia. If it was a slow night (hey, you get balls to the walls nights and you also have slow nights) but sometimes I would sneak out the front of this place on I-10, and run down the west side of the building to the first back door, which was the kitchen door. I would bang on it yelling "IMMIGRATION!! LA MIGRA, DONDE ESTA LOS MOJADOS!!" and well, sometimes this would backfire as my barback, busboy and cook would haul ass out front door, and by time I got back inside, there they go with lights off on their Ford Escort down I-10 terrified. Now I don't have any crew. Alex is one of the hardest working vatos (actually his whole extended family is) I have ever worked with. So I taught him how to bartend. He is now a successful bartender in the Houston area until La Migra!!! shows up.
Bar Unknown, year unknown, Houston, Texas
I have a lot of
photos like these, and don't know where they were taken. I'm sure you have lots
of photos like that too, except they are not with Budweiser Girls like this. I
know a whole lot of Budweiser Girls, also know a crap load of "Lingerie
Girls" and tiddie dancers. They like to be called dancers, but old school
is tiddie dancer. Lingerie Girls: many places here in Houston have them; these
girls go from club to club and for about a hour, walk around, sell tickets while
wearing lingerie, if you win when they call your ticket number, you get a nice
Hawaiian print shirt or some nice lingerie to take home to the old lady who will
then ask you where you been before strangling you with said lingerie. I can't
tell you how many of these lingerie girls will get dresses, or undressed in the
office while i am doing inventory or counting bank, have seen more than my share
of them naked, and well, they don't seem to mind. Maybe if I had small camera
would put them up on myspace.com, not that it would be ethical, but if ethical I
would not be in this business almost 30 years either.
Nick's Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, 2003
Yes I know it is unsanitary to have money in my mouth, but if you ask me for a Dewar's & a Twist, chances are I will give you a twist of my long red hair big boy. This place is one of the places where the Green Bay Packer Fan Club of Houston meets; there is several other locations but this is one of them for the west side due to Houston being almost 10,000 square miles, you don't want those drunks on the road after yet another Packer loss driving from, say, Kingwood 60 miles away. These people have a fondness for Blackberry brandy, which if you have ever had, is enough to either make you quit drinking entirely or suddenly be a fan of The View. They also like Brats, German Potato Salad, pickles for some odd ass reason, and well, cheese. Mostly fond of Miller Lite too, and have never figured that out considering there are a number of breweries in Milwaukee like Blatz and Strohs. It was fun to hide the toilet paper on "Game Day" here and make them beg for a roll in the stall after they gorged themselves on 3-6 brats. Beg for Mercy Packer fan....sing "The Bears Still Suck" song BACKWARDS if you want the toilet paper!
Nick's Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, 2004
This is
another Budweiser Girl, I believe her name is Meredith. We have crossed paths
thru the years at a number of clubs I have worked at. Like almost every
Budweiser Girl I know, she is a knockout and extremely beautiful. And she puts
out! Yes, she puts out small flashing Bud pins, Bud Light T shirts, and those
cool 'crack and shake' cymalume lights like the ones shown on my chest here.
Here is a series of photos from the Houston Chronicle after I got them to come
out and do a piece on this place.
Click
here and be sure to
click on MORE PHOTOS. 90% of the stuff on the walls I did here...on my own
time....something I commonly do at other places I have worked at. Hey, it works,
and change is good.
Scorecard Sports Bar, Houston, Texas, 2005/2006
With new owners, and slight name change, I was lured as a "Hired Gun" to work over at the Scorecard, formerly Scoreboard.....where I had worked 9 years. Like a bad case of herpes that keeps popping up, I keep popping up. The best thing about being a hired gun is you can walk into any situation and handle it. Large bar like this, or small pub. I'm arrogant about my resume and will put it up against anyone's. So good people seek you out knowing you don't drink behind bar, steal them blind, or are a walking Walgreens doing drugs...and of course, can quickly and usually change the landscape with clientele. No, don't call Crimestoppers on the fellow in the lower right of the photo, he is a good guy named Mike, not Jasmine. He is not a predator but has seen the Predator alien movie. I'm trying to figure out which cigar to smoke is it a illegal Cuban one, or a legal Romeo y Julieta? Decisions, decisions.
I have never figured out why these girls like to sign their stuff "Eddie, you're the Breast!" on their promo photos or polaroids..This one is named Heather and she was a former Penthouse Pet. Having all her teeth and appearing to be a real blonde, a customer got her to come by the club for another one of my birthdays. I asked if she wanted a ride in my Pacer. She had never been on that bike in the photo she told me, now we are getting somewhere. She was impressed that I had worked for a number of Bandido Biker people down in Corpus Christi and never got my ass kicked. I told her they liked my old American Motors cars so we 'shared a common link' they like Harleys, I like AMXs.
to be continued................
