Asshole-nigerian-scams-scamalot-lotto-reimbursement

Here is the dumbasses scam word for word when I replied September 2011 before their gmail account disabled:

From: Jenna Woods
To: Eddie Stakes
Sent: Monday, September 19, 2011 5:32 AM
Subject: Re: polaris atvs
Hi again,

DUMBASS SCAMMER: The atv's are now located in Dalton, GA (i just moved here with my new job),like i told you the delivery process is payed by me and I want to finish this deal through eBay because they are a biggest company and we can both be protected and insured.As you can see, you will receive the atv's in max 2-3 days and you will get the chance to inspect it 5 days , test drive it and everything you like.The atv's will be delivered directly to your requested address as soon as I will have the payment confirmation from eBay. eBay will hold the money until you will receive , inspect and decide if you want to keep the atv's. If you're interested to purchase just email me with your full name ,shipping address and your phone number , so I can notify eBay that you are selected as my buyer and they will contact you to explain the entire procedure. Thanks a lot! Jenna

ME: Where is Dalton, GA can I physically inspect these vehicles? I do not want them delivered, I want to check them out first hand please to make sure they look as good as the photos. Why drag ebay into this as they will pinch you for funds and I am a cash buyer so elimanate ebay as they have nothing to do with transaction. Thanks for reply.
Eddie Stakes

DUMBASS SCAMMER: I'm sorry to disappoint you but the atv's are already at the shipping company sealed and ready for the shipping. I have a contract with eBay so this deal must go through them. eBay are responsable for the security of this transaction and you have nothing to be worried about. The payment will not be sent directly to me, but to their agent, so they can hold the money for you until the receipt of the item. The 5 days inspection period begins the moment you receive the product delivered at home and not before. You will have time to inspect the before you decide if you buy it or not.I think that is enough time to test it and drive.In case you don't like it(not your case) eBay will refund you in max 12 hours.Please get back to me with your full name,full address so i can forward your details to eBay in order for you to receive the invoice.Wait your reply

Account disabled by gmail but they have A NUMBER OF SCAMMED PHOTOS above emails mostly with gmail, some with aol. Found this on craigslist:

Are you tired of seeing scammers with gmail accounts like dougkannady0@gmail.com put up
scam craigslist ads with crap like $2610 Dodge Charger;

(Very Nice) 2007 TOYOTA CAMRY SE V6 (Mint Condition) - $2905 with
larry38hopkins@gmail.com
and
2005 Acura TL 3.2 *** - $2890 with paulbostrom01@gmail.com and

CHEAP 2 ATV's FOR SALE - 2oo6 Polaris ATV's plus trailer included! - $2550
toplineexpress@gmail.com
and
2005 GMC Yukon Denali

and 2004 Jeep Rubicon $2900 contact cmx197@gmail.com

White 2003 Nissan Murano SL - $2240 smantharogers@msn.com

at least you got creative on
last one and didn't use a fucking gmail account dumbass. Writing script into all your ads
only gets you busted faster and flagged! I realize times are tough and jobs hard to come
by but scamming is not a job! I realize there are no famous scammers out there, well,
except Bernie Madoff and Ken Lay of Enron but Ken is rotting in hell dead now and Bernie
is in prison being someone's bitch. Neither will ever be on trading cards famous. Is that
what you scammers want?

So far you have about 10 gmail accounts and have wasted a lot of time posting scam ads
until the dumbasses at google get their heads out of their asses (like Bernie is doing in
prison, but not by choice) and shut down all your accounts. Google would have already done
this except they are anticipating the new CBS lineup of comedy and standing around
drinking Snapple while singing we are the fucking world. Of course while spying on you,
but not enough to notice you have 10 fucking accounts!

In the time you spent posting your shit scam ads.....you could have worked a honest day's
work and have some $$$ to show for it. Granted you would not be able to buy a fucking
Toiletota Camwad 2007 for $2905, what the hell is up with the $5 is that paypal stickign
greedy had into scam pocket? Just round off the number dumbass otherwise you stick out
like Charlie Sheen in church.

If any dumbasses actually REPLIED to your various scam ads they deserve to be ripped off.
Don't make it right, but can't cure stupidity either. hopefully they enjoy the plagarized
photos you sold them while gmail plants flowers and sings about trees. Good luck with your
various scams, we may see you on trading card yet! Now go find a damned job or spend your
stimulus on a Polaris with trailer for $2550.00

infiniti tacoma chevy monte carlo camaro 2000 tires nissan maxima tiburon jeep cadillac
toyota honda accord mercedes pacifica bmw rims porsche truck ford ranger honda civic
convertible impala civic ford range rover lexus GMC suv2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 1990 1991
1992 1993 1994 1995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009
2010 ac acura alfa romeo amc aston martin asuna auburn audi a4 a6 a8 q7 TT austin bentley
bernardi bmw 116 118 316 318 320 325 330 335 M3 M5 M6 series 5 6 7 X5 X3 X6 XD XI IS
bradley bricklin bugatti acura tl buick cadillac escalade checker chevrolet chrysler
citroen crosley daewoo daimler datsun de soto delorean detomaso dodge dune buggy dynasty
eagle edsel essex excalibur fargo ferrari fiat ford gazelle geo gmc hillman honda civic
accord s2000 corvette hudson hummer hyundai infiniti innocenti international iso isuzu
jaguar jeep wrangler liberty grand cherokee jensen kaiser kia lada lamborghini lancia land
rover lexus lincoln navigator lotus maniac maserati maybach mazda RX8 MX5 miata mercedes
benz mercury merkur mg mini coopermitsubishi morgan morris mt nash nissan altima maxima
350Z oldsmobile packard panoz passport peugeot plymouth pontiac porsche boxter 911 turbo
carrera GT renault rolls royce rover saab saturn scion seat shelby skoda smart fourfour
subaru suzuki toyota supra targa corolla tacoma land cruiser volkswagen VW passat jetta
bora golf gti coupe touareg phaeton scirocco volvo s40 s60 s80 focus h2 h3 taurus explorer
suv sedan kombi mondeo tuning custom cobalt cl tl legend integra mdx gt spider amx alliace
ambassador concord eagle matador rambler db vantage a3 a5 allroad r8 rs s4 allante deluxe
deville eldorado fleetwood seville dhs dts avalanche camaro cobalt malibu silverado tahoe
concorde imperial sebring charger viper dakota magnum ram royal brava cobra impreza escort
expedition fiesta mustang taurus thunderbird yukon elantra santa fe accent tucson tiburon
e-type s-type patriot tj range rover defender discovery freelander es gs ls lx rx sc
continental premier protege tribute class cl clk cls gl glk ml amg bobcat cougar sable
voyager clubman 3000gt eclipse conquest galantlancer evolution montero pajero 370z
frontier gt-r murano patrol pathfinder safari skyline xterra 405 505 604 concord deluxe
neon voyager reliat k america aztek beaumont bonneville firebird grand prix grand ville
montana phoenix ventura cayman panamera boxster gls rapid fortwo tribeca forester legacy
swift samurai 4runner avalon camry celica prius rav4 tundra beetle corrado vento

Asshole Nigerian Dan Williams! From: Dan Williams willdan7@gmail.com
Date: Monday, January 31, 2011, 1:08 PM
Hello Joe I'm sorry for the late response and delay which was due to some constrain on board..I'm a marine engineer from Alpharetta GA and 'm off shore presently..Your asking price is fair and as for pick up will not be a problem as I have contacted an agency to handle the transportation cos i have other vital deliveries. I shall send you a cashier check for the payment..Its guaranteed and shall be easily cashed.. You keep your asking $2,000 for the payment,the balance left on the check is for the agency to handle the pick up and freight so you send it out and they can be in your location for the pick-up at your convenience. You provide me your full name,address and phone # so that the check can be mailed to you..I await the information details asap. I shall give you a call once i arrive onshore likewise the agent so that all arrangement can be intact..The best way to contact me is via email as I'm always running around with things.
Dan Williams US Marine Corps 2nd Assault Amphibian Battalion, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine
Expeditionary Force

Oh shut the fuck up asshole, if a marine ever came across your ass he would stick your laptop up your mugu ass for impersonating a marine. Do you really think anyone uses cashiers checks anymore dumbass?

(Year 2010) In order to redeem the good image of our country Nigeria, the Acting President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria Dr. Goodluck .E. Jonathan has ordered the immediate reimbursement to the affected victims in accordance with the U.N. recommendations. Due to the corrupt and inefficient Banking Systems in Nigeria, these payments are to be made by CITI BANK PLC UK as the corresponding paying bank under the funding assistance of the CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA and WORLD BANK.
Thus if you have been scammed before, you are hereby instructed to provide us your FULL NAME(S) and HOW MUCH YOU SCAMMED in a simply and comprehensive mail to enable us work reimbursement you accordingly. Act fast as the government has few months to accomplish this task and will not tolerate any delay or what so ever. Regards
Mr. Eddy Fredman eddy.fredman@gmail.com
For reimbursement committee

Shut the fuck up "Doctor Goodluck"! They are basically double dipping, scamming same dumbasses that fell for this shit to begin with. Not sure those victims have any money left mugu, but what the hell, can't blame you for trying. Good image of our country Nigeria? It's a fucking cesspool with scams as main export!

Hello,
Thanks for the mail, am okay with the price of the vehicle, i will want you to consider the vehicle sold to me as i am ready to pay for the vehicle. A client of mine will issue the check on my behalf for the payment of the vehicle which the shipping fee will be included on the amount that will be on the check. As soon as you have the check, you will have to get the cost of the vehicle deduct from the fund and send the remaining balance to the shipping company that will be coming for the pick up of the vehicle. If you are okay with this, i will want you to get back to me with the following information, your full name and address (inclusive of Zipcode) to send the check to and your mobile phone number. I will be expecting to read from you as soon as possible. Regards, Thomas The Asshole nigerian Scammer
albecombs@yahoo.com alias Albe Combs

asshole nigerian of the week:
There is this fund 18,891,000 USD which was stopped during transfer by the ECOWAS-CEDEAO for violating the rules and directives of the organisation before transferring such fund outside the ECOWAS region. This fund has been with the ECOWAS for the past six months and the owner was unable to provide the five requested documents to prove the genuine of the fund, therefore has abandoned the fund due to the fact that the money was looted from the government. Why I contacted you is to front you as the owner of the fund to claim this fund from the ECOWAS as the name of the owner and yours are in conformity with that in our file, rather than the fund going into the ECOWAS purse as due already.
I will supply you all the necessary details and the ECOWAS Form which you will fill and submit to my department for the fund claiming, I will be working underground while you stand as the owner of the fund and I will be detailing you what to do at the appropriate time. The deal will be 60% for me and my partner here while 30% will be for you and the other 10% will be for expenses made while transferring the fund into your account. As soon as I receive your approval of this deal, I will not hesitate to comply in good faith.
Regards,
Mrs. Halima AHMED Director Administration and General Services Department,
ECOWAS-CEDEAO

ANUS OF THE YEAR PHISHING AD!

Hi Mate !
My name is Gary Buchannan from London UK. I saw your Wanted Ad so I decided to write you as I have the item(s) in stock. Get back to me ASAP if you are still interested. What's your cell # ?
Thanks, Gary Buchannan N17 9YA London UK +447024079228 gary.buchannan@yahoo.com

WIN THE LOTTO!
Official letter & check!!!
We were so excited! Problem is I am not sure where we could cash & spend this "hunded" of dollars! Dumbasses, if you are going to send out silly bullshit at least learn how to fucking spell! Scam-a-lot lotto, you probably never were a winner!

Chase $20 Survey Reward Scam, click here!

Nigerian Email Conference! Fresh crickets for continental breakfast, and hot water in rooms, win a used OUT OF CONTROL TOYOTA!

Below you will find just a small sample of asshole nigerian emails, not all from nigeria, which smells like a llama's ass that has squirts. You will find asshole nigerian scams with worthless cashier's checks, bullshit job offers, bullshit lines of well, bullshit promising you millions of dollars the asshole don't have, and bullshit lottos that don't exist! Yes, there are many more bullshit nigerians scams out there like ebay ones threatening you with bad feedback, or why won't you reply? and have ficticious links they want you to click on to steal your user ID and passwords. Same with chase bank, laredo national bank, washington mutual bank to name a few, pick any credit union, same shit.

Congratulations to ASSHOLE NIGERIAN award winner of the day Marc Hilary!
"Hello,
My name is Marc Hilary.i would like to know if you still have your car for sale.please do mail me back with the last price and if there are othere availble pictures please do send them with it.or you can call me on 07024054317" marc_hilary@yahoo.com

Oh yes, let me screw myself with your worthless cashier's check! Every assumes a cashiers check is "good" right asshole?
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These have to be the stupidest mother fuckers out there. CUM-A-LOT (ok, SCAM-A-LOT) promotions keeps changing emails so much it is hard to keep up with them to collect my winnings!! Each time I try to email them their server has shut them all down dammit! One day these dumbasses will get someone to fall for this bullshit. The funniest part is that in their email, they talk about "security" then in same sentence, "uh, we fucked up some numbers!" See highlighted area below.

Camelot Lottery Promos,
406 Bury New Rd.,
Whitefield,
Manchester M45 7SX
U.K.
Lucky Winner,

We are pleased to inform you that you are one of the selected winners of the Camelot Lottery Promos held on 15th of August 2005. Your email address attached to your ticket number 9901-0148-790-691, with serial number 6109-17 drew the lucky numbers 990-11-815-37-10-83; the lottery was categorized into four zonal (Africa, America, Europe and Asia) stages. Consequently you have won
the lottery in the 2nd category. You have therefore been approved for a lump sum pay out of[Three Hundred Thousand]US dollars Credited to file
REF NO: MELI-T/17-F044262312 Batch No. 13/FFP/LDL/037.

All participants were selected through a computer ballot system drawn from 25,000 names from the Middle East, Asia, Africa, Canada, Europe, USA and North America. All participants in this Lottery Program have been selected randomly through a computer Ballot System drawn from over
200,000 Companies and 30,000,000 individual emails address from all search engines and web sites. This promotional program will take place every year until the games begin in Beijing China in 2008. However, winners are only eligible for claims once.

Due to the mix up of some numbers and names, we ask that you keep this award strictly from public notice until your claim has been processed and your money remitted to your account. This is part of our security protocol to avoid double claiming or unscrupulous acts by participants of this program.

Asshole of the day is John Smith, which is not his real name as any John Smith I know can spell better than a drunk chimpanzee at the Houston Zoo. This asshole wrote me Aug 18th and ovviously don't even know what a fuel pump is!

Good day seller,
I'm enquiring about your Has new carb, fuel pump, new AMC Can you please let me know if it still for sale and also i will like to know the last offering price. so thatpayment can be made out to you via check and also make sure you get back to me with the present condition of it and also the picture.hope tohear from you now,my regards to you and your family, thanks
smith john.

Hello Friend,
I am Dr. Alex Vessin. and I represent Mr. Mikhail Khordokovsky the former C.E.O of Yukos Oil Company in Russia. I have a very sensitive and confidential brief from this top (oligarch) to ask for your partnership in re-profiling funds US$42.3 Million. I will give the details, but in summary, the funds are coming via Bank Menatep.
This is a legitimate transaction. You will be paid 10% for your "Management Fees".If you are interested, please write back by mail and provide me with your confidential telephone number,fax number and email address and I will provide further details and instructions. Please keep this confidential; we can't afford more political problems.
Finally, please note that this must be concluded within two weeks.Please write back promptly with this email address, dr_alexvessin@hotmail.com I look forward to it.
Regards, Dr. Alex Vessin.

I look forward to seeing your asshole that will be spitting out yellow tuberlocisis in Lefortovo!

They will answer a ad you have placed for a car for sale, and their reply will be generic so as not to get kicked off their server:

Hello, I'm interested in buying your Car and i'll like to Pay $600 for the Car. I will like you to mail me more details about the Car and let me know if i need to do any form of restoration on the it. Hope to hear from you soon. Best wishes. Larenzo Cuzzio.
Then after you might reply, send you this shit:
Dear Eddie, How are you doing? i hope all is well. I am willing to pay $600 for the Car. I will like you to email me some photos of the Car. As for payment, I will instruct my client in the US to issue a cashier's cheque of $6,870, as i am not in the US at the moment. Once you receive the cashier's cheque, i will like you to wire the excess amount to my shipper the same day you receive the cheque so that he can immediately come for collection of the car.
Pls let me know if i can trust you in wiring the excess funds to my shipper once you receive the cashier's cheque, as you know it is not easy to trust people nowadays. Note: my shipper will be picking up some other heavy goods for me in the US, apart from the car i am buying from you, that is why his shipping fee is that much. And if you are okay with this way of payment, pls mail me your full details (Name, address and phone numbers) so that my client can send you the payment. Hope to hear from you soon. Best wishes.
Larenzo Cuzzio
larenzo.cuzzio@galaway.com

Yes, only a IDIOT would fall for this stupid Nigerian Scam shit.

ASSHOLE SCAMMERS! Choose a name that does not have Abacha in it! Email all these "agents" for details on how YOU can have a piece of $55 million dollars!
GOOD DAY TO YOU,
FIRST I MUST SOLICIT YOUR STRICTEST CONFIDENCE IN THIS TRANSACTION AND I
PRAY THAT MY DECISION TO CONTACT YOU WILL BE GIVEN GENUINE APPROVAL
CONSIDERING THE FACTS WE HAVE NOT KNOWN EACH OTHER BEFORE. I WISH TO USE
THIS OPPORTUNITY TO INTRODUCE MYSELF TO YOU.I AM JACKSON PETER FROM LIBERIA
WEST AFRICA.MY FATHER BEFORE HE DIED HE REAVEALED TO ME ABOUT THE BOXES CONTAINING $19 MILLION U S DOLLARS. JACKSON PETER
peterson2p@hotmail.com

MR. WANG QIN
HANG SENG BANK LTD.
SAI WAN HO BRANCH,
171 SHAUKIWAN ROAD,
HONG KONG.
w_qin100@yahoo.com

Although you do not know me but I have a lucrative business proposal of mutual
interest to share with you. Firstly, let me start by introducing myself. I am
Mr. Wang Qin, Credit officer of the Hang Seng Bank Ltd Hong Kong. I have a
concealed business suggestion as below;

A long time ago, just before the U.S and Iraqi war, one of our numerous
clients named Major Fadi Basem who was with the Iraqi forces and also a
business man based in Iraq made a numbered fixed deposit for 18 calendar
months, with a value of Twenty-Four Million, Five Hundred Thousand United
States Dollars (US$24,500,000.00) in my branch. Upon maturity several notice
has since been sent to him, even during the war early last year. Again after
the war another notification was sent and still no response came from him or
any member of his family. We later found out that the Major and his family had
been killed during the war in a bomb blast that hit their home.

Too bad this Chinese Nigerian inbred scammer was not in that house when bomb hit, hit mother was getting cornholed by a 8 foot elephant dong! Wang Qin, wasn't that a fucked up song in the 1980s about some kind of stupid dance? "Everybody Wang Qin tonight!"

Chen Qingxuan
Lloyds TSB Pacific Limited
Hong Kong Branch

Thank you for giving me your time. Please be patient and read my email to you.
I am a staff of Lloyds TSB Group attached in private Banking Services. I am
contacting you concerning a customer and, an investment placed under our banks
management 3 years ago, I contacted you independently of our investigation and
no one is informed of this communication and I would like to intimate you with
certain facts that I believe would be of interest to you. If you are familiar with private banking affairs, those who patronize our services usually prefer anonymity, but also some levels of detachment from
conventional processes.

You stupid asshole Nigerian (you are Nigerian aren't you Hong Dong boy?) "if you are familiar with private banking you will know about anonymity" So this stupid fucker sends this scam to hundreds of undisclosed recipients!

Congratulations to asshole Nigerian scammer of the month of March 2005:
MR.ABDUL RAHIM
BILLS AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,
CREDID BANK (C.B.)
>PARAKU-BENIN REPUBLIC
TELEPHONE:22972 62 50
emai:contact1@mail2banker.com
who wants everyone to know that:
"HELLO, MY PUSSY IS VERY SMALL WHY?"
Well, abdul it is because of the chimps you sleep with!

Asshole of the YEAR has to be this fool who sent me a Enron scam email from 'Michael Ramsey' not realizing I am in fucking Houston!
Dear Friend,
Good day to you. I may have to trouble your sense of personal achievement and reward for an opportunity properly taken advantage of.

I am Mr. Michael Ramsey, a representative and attorney to Kenneth Lay, the former chairman & CEO, Enron Corp. Industry: Energy &Natural Resources Home, presently in jail and facing trial on charges of corruption and embezzlement of funds while in Power. He deposited ($21,000,000.00) with me when he was in power as the chairman.

I am contacting you because I want you to deal with the Finance house and claim the money on my behalf since I have declared that the Funds belong to my foreign business partner. You shall also be required to assist me in investment in your country. I hope to trust you as a God fearing person who will not sit on this money when you claim it, rather assist me properly, share in this percentage, 60% to me and 40% to you. When I receive your positive response I will give you viable information relating to this project i.e. the Finance institution where the money was deposited and the required documentation that will enable you lay claims to the funds, which is very important. What I need is for you to indicate your interest that you will assist us by receiving the money on my behalf in Europe. For this, you shall be considered to be the beneficiary to the funds. The project in brief, is that the funds with which we intend to carry out our proposed investments in your country, i!
s presently in the custody of a bank in Europe. I do not want the government of my Country to know about the money because they will believe I got the money from the sales of Enron stock when he was the Chairman & C.E.O.of Enron

Once I have your details in full, the finance institution will contact you for Release of the funds to your account. As soon as payment is effected, and the amount mentioned above is successfully transferred into your account, I intend to use my own share in acquiring some estates abroad. For this too you shall also be the overseas manager of all our properties and you will be paid based on a certain percentage agreed on by both parties. I guarantee you that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law. Please get in touch with me urgently by E-mail: m101r231@faithmail.com . I am presently in LONDON.

Please, provide me the following:
1. Full Name
2. Your Telephone Number and Fax Number
3. Your Contact Address.
Best Regards,
Michael Ramsey.

Michael Ramsey is currently in the Harris County Jail (Houston) being buttfucked by gangbangers, so you will be able to park your Land Rover in his ass in a few days.

Same assholes, different scam, but to "fly under the radar" they make it generic, and if you answer, then they ask if they can send a worthless cashiers check, and a 'client' will pick up the car. i got your fucking client here he is a undercover FBI agent, hope you like the bologna sandwiches in the Harris County Jail.

For those of you who might be selling a old car, there was a report
on the NBC News about a new twist to a Nigerian scam. I have
written about this before. Some of you know about it,
others may not. But the 'buyer' always offers 'more' than the car is worth,
asking you 'to send the remainder' to them, usually in Nigeria or some scum
filled cesspool like that in Africa. The big problem here is that PEOPLE
AUTOMATICALLY ASSUME A CASHIERS CHECK IS "GOOD" and it IS NOT. Screaming?
You bet your ass. As some people just don't get it. On the news, they
interviewed a coupe from Minnesota who had their little 64 Valiant for sale,
and the 'buyer' found them on the internet or in a old car publication, and
contacted them. They fell for it hook, line and sinker.

So not only did they "cash" the cashiers check quickly, they also "wired"
the remainder of the funds to some gorilla humping rebel in Congo. The bank
came back to them a week later and said "uh, this cashiers check is no
good". Yes, the "cashiers check" looked authentic; showed it on the news,
Chase Bank, account numbers, REAL good looking one. In their haste, the
'sellers' cashed it. The lady said 'it is not that we are stupid, they are
just smart'. No......it is that she is a idiot, and it is that she got
conned by more idiots. So they are stuck with a little Valiant (the 'buyer's
friend never came to pick up the car in three days, duh) and they are now
out $8700. Maybe rich Nigerian Bank Official friends of mine I commonly get
emails from can help them out:

Merry Christmas Nigerian Asshole from Canada!
i am interested in your 1971-AMC Matador 2dr[$3500] i will like to pay with a check payable in america fund.i will like you to send the pics via e-mail and. am located in switzerland.don't worry about the shipping,i have a shipping agent that will take care of it. as long as the deal is on i will like you to send down your name and address in which you will use in receiving the check in american fund. waiting for your quick response. regards;;;; martin english;;;;;
owo_oyinbo@yahoo.ca

My reply to Assbundy of the AnalGroup:
Look dumbass, do a search on 'nigerian scam' on www.google.com and this is what you get:
Results 1 - 10 of about 891,000 for nigerian scam. (0.45 seconds)

I will send some of your dumb ass countrymen your way to repatronize yourself and maybe go eat some zebra. After a appetizer of dung bettles and flies of course. If it wasn't for asshole nigerians there would not be a
'nigerian scam' in the dictionary. Sort of like fucking xerox. When someone makes copies they say 'I'm going to xerox some copies' When someone gets fucked by your inbred spear throwing, dirt eating asshole countrymen, they
call it 'nigerian scam'
Live with it change the way people look at your toilet of a country. Help your people feed themselves before you come to this country and worry about what we think of your back ass piece of shit cesspool nation. It is self righteous assholes like yourself who think the world revolves around you and should have a favorable view about getting ripped off by your family living in a mud hut eating rocks while your fucking nasty army lives like kings and commits genocide. I guess you will be the new 'nigerian asshole of the week' winner on my website! Congratulations, wish I could send you a bag of UN rice or elephant dung. Amazing that you are able to applaud (see first sentence) while other hand is up donkey's ass gathering food for family of 33 that Sally Struthers ate all the food drop from UN with help of Kristie Alley. Anyone wishing to email good old Irishman can get ahold of him (geez, or HER) at the email above, my ISP blocked donkeyipathincest.

hello Cynthia,

I have contacted my client and he has agreed to pay your offer for the car ($3,400). he has also instructed me to carry on with this transaction on his behalf. my client had earlier made out a certified cashiers check of $9,000 which is a refund payment of a cancelled order earlier made by my client for the purchase of a previous car and its shipment charges before he travelled to austrailer on a business trip. unfortunately, the car was sold. The amount on the check he deposited with me for the car is more than what should be paid to you now. so the check is now meant for the total expenses which includes the purchase of your car, the pick up of the car from its present location and settling all shipping charges as my client has instructed.

all you need do is to deduct the cost of your car $3,400 and send the balance of $5,600 to my client via western union money transfer/moneyGram to enable him offset the pick up charges and also secure a shipper. once this is affected, my agent will be there to pick up of the car and also handle the shipping arrangements. he will also handle all documentations on behalf of my client.

if you do approve of this payment arrangement, do let me know and provide me with your full name, address and phone number for the cashiers check to be delivered you via courier and subsequent contact by my agent who will there for the pickup of the car. do reply asap.

have a lovely day.

ken

HELLO, I AM CYNTHIA COLE BY NAME , I AMINTERESTED IN BUYING YOUR CAR PLACED ON THE WEB FOR SALEL, I WILL LIKE TO KNOW IF IT IS GOOD CONDITION AND I WILL WANT YOU TO GIVE ME THE LAST PRICE OFFER, I WILL ALSO LIKE TO KNOW IF I CAN SEE THE PICTURES OF THE CAR IF AVAILABLE, I WILL ALSO LIKE TO KNOW IF CASHIER CHEQUE IS ACCEPTABLE FOR PAYMENT.IF ACCEPTABLE,PLS KINDLY FURNISH MEWITH THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION BELLOW SO THAT PAYMENT CAN BE MADE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

Of course I know Cooper. He is a friend of mine. You're not. You should not be send e-mails to people you do not no. Tha't's rude and lazy on your part. And don't you dare suggest to me I should be off Coop's mailing list. That's not for you to suggest. You just stop using other peoples list for your mail outs. I can't beleive you have the nerve to use someones mailing list for your own. And I sure don't need your instuction about blocking senders. You are blocked, junked, and plain ignorant and stupid. I don't want to hear from you again., you asshole dumbfuck'en moron! Clarence pastprformer@surfbest.net
PS: the above wants to get involved with all Nigerian scams, penile enlargement groups, and porno mailing lists, so if you get annoying emails from any of them, Clarence wishes for you to forward them to his spanking self.

This is the new twist to the scam, these assholes will send you a 'generic' email like below, and if you reply, then they will up the ante with the cashiers check and more bullshit:

> I,m interested in your car( AMC ) add. get me back for quick sales if sale avaliable.
> thanks Get your free email from http://mymail.fastermail.com

More Nigerian assholes:
This above one is unusual as they claim to be from Iraq!
Subject: eddiestakes,PLEASE ASSIST
[!TO!]
Dear Friend,
I am Mrs Azzar Abdul-Hafiz the wife to Karid Abdul -Hafiz the C.E.O.
gulflink oil export company Ltd. Who was killed by president Sadam Hussein and his cohorts over allegations that my husband supplied crude oil to Europe, U.S.A. and revealed secret information of Iraq's arms & wealth to United nations security council & NATO. I am absolutely certain my husband is innocent of all criminal allegations imposed on him by president Sadam Hussein he was given no chance to defend himself they killed him unjustly.I am so troubled,my spirit refuses to be at rest. The quick need for contacting you is because my husband has been killed unjustly and I am sure if we don't act fast Sadam
Hussein's group will come for our wealth & millions of American Dollars about ($32,000,000.00) thirtytwo million USD will be seized.my husband had an account with ARAB ROYAL BANK IRAQ. If we don't arrange for a quick transfer of all this millions of U.S Dollars,we will loose all to Sadam Hussein's group and nobody can ask them any question. I am a signatory to the account and i have concluded all necessary arrangements for the smooth success of this transfer of our funds overseas for safekeeping and good investments. We only need a good honest, trustworthy, highly-secretive and confidential person who we can offer 20% of the total sum to so that the person can help us arrange for a good offshore bank account for easy money transfer. Contact me for full details.Thanks for your anticipated co-operation. yours sincerely
Mrs Azzar Abdul-Hafiz
OH PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There is no fucking electricity in Baghdad.

ASSHOLE NIGERIAN of the month for October 03 is BRIGHT JOHN who obviously is not too damned bright for sending me 3 emails on cars I have for sale! And using a Yahoo account! Violation of terms! Shut his ass down! Here is one of this idiot's emails:

Dear eddie
My name is Bright john sales manager of better automobile .we are located in west africa with our various branches in ghana, togo, nigeria ,with our head office in southafrica
We are an automobile procurement concern that specialise in the purchase and shipping of vehicles, truk, bike, boats, e.tc to our numerous customers worldwide.We have a customer interested in purchasing your (car) mentioned above for the sum of $2,200. We will arrange a pick up of the vehicle once payment is confirmed by you.Please acknowledge the offer and we will instruct the buyer to have the funds remitted to your account as soon as possible.You can call me on +234 08023711140
Thanks and God bless.
MR Bright....

Yes, Mr. Bright! That $2200 would be better spent to flush the roach eggs out of the slabs of fat on your wife's big ass. No, don't do that, as then your dung eating rodent children would not have anything to eat in your lifeless piece of shit country, and the gorillas and lions would not have anything to eat, need to fatten up those kids a little! Sally Struthers can live without a meal for one day? Don't you watch South Park???
===================================

----- Original Message -----

From: davis parker

Subject: 1972 Ambassador SST 360V8,$2900

Dear Sir,
I am an Auto/Electronic Used Equipment dealer based in Geneva-Switzerland.

Please I want to know if you can shipp to Europe as my shipping agent will handle the shipping arrangement on my behalf after the payment has been made.
You should please give me the last price if there will be any discount.
Also,I will like to know if you will accept a Certified Cashier check or Money Order drawn from the American bank.
If that is okay by you,please get back to me as soon as possible.

Regards,
Davis Parker
========================================

Mark Cole is the Asshole Nigerian Scam Artist of the month!
For some reason he decides to send a form email to everyone with the same crap on it wanting to buy their car; not realizing he is contacting the same person with multiple vehicles. By the time this clown reads this his email account at yahoo will have been shut down, but old 'mark cole' (not his real name) will simply fire up another account with another server to try to scam more people, this was his latest stunt:
==================

This is a response from a reader to your ep.com Classifieds ad (number 1645018). The ad was being read on site ep.com Classifieds.
Dear Seller,
I wish to refer you to your advert placed on the internet for the
sale of your 80 AMC Spirit GT . Haven taken a good look, at
your advert, I have decided to make a formal bid for the purchase
of the 80 AMC Spirit GT for $1,900 Please confirm it's
availability and conditions.If there are more information on it
please feel free to send it to me ...
In terms of shipping, that would be taken care off by me
( personally). I Will be waiting for you reply.
Thanks
Mark Cole..

I got SEVEN form messages from this idiot! All for my different cars! Since then epage.com has changed their setup and they commonly monitor assholes emails for 'bulk' sending.

----- Original Message -----

Subject: 1972 AMC Ambassador SST wagON

Hello,
My name is THOMAS COKER i`m interested in purchasing your advertised car and the price $2,250 is okay with me,And i will like you not to worry about the shipping, I contact a friend in states so
he said he can organize an agent in the Us would be on ground to pick up the car as soon as we seal this transaction and i will like you to know that my mode of payment is by cashier's cheque drawn from and
American bank . It is a very good car .I Iook forward to hear from you soon. Respond asap if this is ok by you.
Thanks
Thomas.
-runner up ASSHOLE SCAM ARTISTS OF THE WEEK AWARDS:-

POWERBALL INTERNATIONAL LOTTO. BV PROMO/PRIZE AWARD DEPARTMENT.
ADDRESS: KRUISLAAN 407, 1098 SJ , AMSTERDAM - THE NETHERLANDS.
REF: PBIL /7585021-47/03
BATCH: 21/21939678/GIGP
ATTENTION:
RE / AWARD NOTIFICATION / PROCESSING ADVICE: BHM

We are pleased to inform you of the announcement today, 15th September, 2003
of winners of the SCIENTIFIC GAME PROMO LOTTERY; THE NETHERLANDS /
INTERNATIONAL, PROGRAMS held on 10th September, 2003. Your email address
attached to ticket number 89-02897893, with serial number 95020 drew the
lucky numbers 14-21-33-42-49-63, and consequently won the lottery in the 1st
category. You have therefore been approved of a lump sum pay out of
US$500,000.00 (FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED STATE DOLLARS) in credited to
file REF NO. PBIL /7585021-47/03. This is from total prize money of
US$4,400,000.00 shared among the seventeen international winners in 1st-3rd
categories. All participants were selected through a computer ballot system
drawn form 25,000 company email addresses and 30,000,000 individual email
addresses from Australia, New Zealand, America, Europe, North America and
Asia as part of International Promotions Program, which is conducted
annually.

CONGRATULATIONS!

Your fund is now in custody of a financial Security company insured in your
FILE REFERENCE. Due to the mix up of some numbers and names, we ask that you
keep this award strictly from public notice until your claim has been
processed and your money remitted to your account.

This is part of our security protocol to avoid double claiming or
unscrupulous acts by participants of this program. This lottery program was
promoted by our group of philanthropist headed by Mr. Bill Gates. We hope
with a part of you prize, you will participate in our end of year high
stakes US$10,000,000 million Dollars International Lottery.
To begin your claim, please contact your file/claim officer:
MR. BISHOP KELLY, of POWERBALL INTERNATIONAL LOTTO. BV. (AMSTERDAM - THE
NETHERLANDS).
On TEL: 0031-620-576-753.

Please be informed that NON RESIDENCE of THE NETHERLANDS will be required to
make a NON DEDUCTABLE advance payment of processment and
legal documentation charges of 550.00 Euros to enable our legal
department acquire Naturalization papers from the Court prior to award
payment policy as required by the paying Financial Security Company. Please
be aware that your Paying Authority will Effect Payment Swiftly upon
satisfactory Report, Verifications and validation provided by our processing
Agent; that would be designated to your file. For due processment and
remittance of your winning prize to your designated account of your choice.
Remember, all prize money must be claimed not later than 21st - 23rd
September, 2003. After this date, all funds will be returned as unclaimed.

NOTE: In order to avoid unnecessary delays and complications, please
remember to quote your reference and batch numbers in every one of your
correspondences with your agent.

Furthermore, should there be any change of your address, do inform your
claims agent as soon as possible.

Congratulations once again from our team of staff and thank you for
being part of our promotional program.

Note: Anybody under the age of 18 is AUTOMATICALY DISQUALIFIED.

Sincerely,

Joan Van Bosch (Mrs.)
(Lottery Coordinator)

INTERNATIONAL LOTTO BV
BURDENSTRAAT 21B
2053 DS AMSTERDAM.
RE / AWARD NOTIFICATION / PROCESSMENT
ADVICE:
We are pleased to inform you of the announcement
today, 12th november, 2003 of winners of the
SCIENTIFIC GAME PROMO LOTTERY; THE NETHERLANDS /
INTERNATIONAL, PROGRAMS held on 2nd october, 2003. Your
email address attached to ticket number
023-56678230954, drew the lucky numbers
7-14-21-42-49-59,batch number 6858/NL and
consequently won the lottery in the 1st category. You
have therefore been approved of a lump sum pay out of
EURO 1,500.000.00 (ONE MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND
EUROS) in credited to file LOTTERY REF NO.
SGIL/763276/03. This is from total prize money of
EURO 20,000,000.00 shared among the seventeen
international winners in categories C with seriel
number: IL/FLW/12-C033721192.
All participants were selected through a computer
ballot system drawn form 25,000 company email
addresses and 30,000,000 individual email addresses
from Australia, New Zealand, America, Europe, North
America and Asia as part of International Promotions
Program, which is conducted annually.
CONGRATULATIONS!
Your fund is now in custody of a financial Security
company insured in your FILE REFERENCE. Due to the
mix up of some numbers and names, we ask that you
keep this award strictly from public notice until your
claim has been processed and your money remitted to
your account.
This is part of our security protocol to avoid double
claiming or unscrupulous acts by participants of this
program. This lottery program was promoted by our
group of philanthropist headed by the netherland
government. We hope with a part of you prize, you
will participate in our end of year high stakes EURO
10,000,000 million International Lottery.
To begin your claim, please contact your file/claim
officer:

MR.RAYMOND WILLIAMS
FOREIGN SERVICE MANAGER
GLOBAL SECURITY FINANCE BV.
AMSTERDAM,NL
TEL/FAX 31 645 136 270
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU ARE NOVEMBER'S ASSHOLE OF THE WEEK! YOU WIN A SIX PACK OF LONE STAR BEER AND A BAG OF PORK RINDS THAT WAS OPENED IN AUGUST! There will be a small fee of five Lone Star Beers and six stale pork rinds however.

-----OK, IT WAS A TIE, HERE IS ANOTHER ASSHOLE!!!!----
From the Desk of Esele Ered
Deputy General Director
Standard Trust Bank.
Plot 126, broad Street, V.Island
Lagos
PRIVATE EMAIL: esele2003@tiscali.co.uk
Subject Matter: Invitation to act as Next-of-Kin
I write this letter in confidence, believing that it will reach you in high
spirit and I believe you will maintain the level of confidence and trust
matters of this nature requires. Though, I know that this proposal may make
you apprehensive and worried,
but I assure you that all will be well at the end.

Before proceeding, I wish to introduce myself. I am Esele Fred, Deputy
General
Manager, (credit Controls) with Standard Trust Bank Limited, Lagos. I got
your contact during my private search at the information center here in
nigeria chamber of commence and industry and i want to believe that you
will be very honest,committed and capable in assiting in this business
venture.
The Proposal:

A forigner late engineer theophilus baker,an oil merchant/contractor with
the goverment of nigeria, until his death, over a year ago,was a victim
of a kenya airways;bus(A310-300)flight kq430 plane crash.The
deceased,engineer
theopilus baker,banked with us and has a closing balance as at july 2000
worth $4.5m(four million five hundredthousand usd).Which my bank expects
a next of kin as beneficiary to no avail.Valueable efforts have been made
by standard Trust Bank Plc to get in touch with any of late theopilus baker
family as beneficiary to his estates without success.

It is because of the perceived possibility of not being able to locate any
of Late Engr. theophilus baker's next of kin, since he had no wife or
children
that is known to the bank. Consequently, the chairman and the board of
Directors
are planning to declare the fund "Unclaimed" and transfer it to special
trust fund for purchase of arms and ammunition for ECOMOG soldiers in sierra
Leone and Liberia zones in the East Africasub-regions. In other to avert
this negative development, I now seek your permission to have you stand
as next-of -kin
of the late engineer theophilus baker so that the
fund $4.5M (FOUR MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOSAND USD) will be released and
paid into your account as beneficiary's next of kin. I will help to arrange
all documents and proves to enable us get this fund out. I have secured
from the probate registry an order of mandamus to locate any of the deceased
beneficiary and more so, I am assuring you that this transaction is risk
free. Once the fund is moved to your nominated account, you will be entitle
to 20% while we keep 75% and 5% will be set aside to offset any expenses
both locally and international.The 75% I will settle some people here. You
will entitle to substantial part from my percentage, in trust for
investment.
As soon as I receive your acceptance in principle, I will furnish you with
the necessary modalities for commencement.

Finally, I am relying my confidence in you, having opened up to you, if
however you are not interested, please feel free to destroy this information
as I will continue to scout for willing partner(s).
Thanks and God bless you
Esele Fred.
----THESE SCAM ARTISTS REALLY DON'T GET IT!!??----

For introductory purpose, I am DR. RAYMOND OKUNTIMO, a member of the
Contract Review Panel set up by the newly elected civilian government
of Nigeria to look into all contract awards and payments to foreign
contractors by all her agencies with a view of ascertaining their
genuineness.

Or....this guy.....
DEAR FRIEND,
MY NAME IS BWALYA CHILUBA,THE COUSIN TO THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC
OF ZAMBIA,WHO WAS RECENTLY STRIPPED OF ALL HIS IMMUNITY AND SOON TO FACE CHA
RGES FOR CORRUCPTION AND STEALING OF PUBLIC FUNDS WHILE IN OFFICE.HAVING
WORK CLOSELY WITH FREDERICK CHILUBA AND OTHER TOP OFFICIAL OF IS
ADMINISRRATION IN THE AREA OF OF PRIVATE INVESTMENT,PROPERTY MANAGEMENT
UNTIL RECENTLY WHEN FREDERICK WAS ARRESTED ON 24th FEBRUARY AND A TAX FORCE
WAS SET UP TO PROBE AND SEIZE ALL FUNDS,PROPERTY BELIEVE TO BE AGUIRE THRU
PLUNDERED FUNDS,BY GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS,THEIR SPOUSE AND BUSINESS ASSOCIATE.
NOW THAT FREDERICK CHILUBA MY COUSIN HAS LOST HIS BID IN THE SUPREME COURT
TO RETAIN IS IMMUNITY THREE TOP OFFICIALS FROM HIS FORMER ADMINISTRATION HAS
TO ARRANGE A SPECIAL AND SECRET TRIP FOR ME TO MOVE THE SUM OF TWENTHY FIVE
MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS{$25,000.OOO.OO}OUT OF LUSAKA VIA DOMOCRATIC
REPUBLIC OF CONGO (hey, this one was a GOOD one, not one period in the whole
huge paragraph!!!
*BWALA is the grunts I make after eating a chili/beef burrito!!!!!

Or this festering pile of fly infested monkey dung:
Private Email: isaacsavimbi@netscape.net
Telephone number:0031-648-192-081
Compliments of the seasons

Good Day!,Sir / Madam

With a warm heart I offer my friendship and greetings, I hope this mail
meets you in good time. However strange or surprising this contact might
seem to you,as we have not met personally or had any dealings in the past, I
humbly ask that you take due consideration of its importance and immense
benefit. I also sincerely seek your confidence in this transaction,which I
propose to you as a person of integrity.

Or bone daddy sand sucking, ivory poachin, larvae chewing:

First and foremost I wish to introduce myself properly, My name is Isaac
Oliveira M. Savimbi, I am a nephew and Personal Assistant to Late Jonas
Malheiro Savimbi, leader of UNITA (National Union for the Total Independence
of Angola). As led by my instinct, I selected your email address from an
internet directory, in my search for a partner, hence this proposal.

They all should be napalmed. Ok, one more rich AMC friend who wants your
attention:
From the Desk of:
MR. DAVE AFAM.STANDARD TRUST BANK LTD, NIGERIA.
                  ATTENTION

                   PLEASE:
PROPOSAL Permit me to introduce myself to you. My
name is Mr DAVE AFAM, Managing Director of
Standard Trust Bank Ltd, Lagos-Nigeria. I came to know
about you in my private search for a reliable
person/company to handle a confidential transaction on
behalf of my Colleagues and myself. As a matter of
fact, I got your information from the Nigerian Chamber
of Commerce and Industry/Nigerian Export Promotion
Council.

Yup, and I'm AMC Emeritus Supreme Council used car parts junk dealer.
Ok, some of that, not sure about the emu thing, but emu burgers are really
good, and low fat too.
And here is my own from just today, get these all the time:

Hello,

I am still very much interested in the 1971 1A197H283628 , as a regard for
the shipping i have able to contact a shipping agent who will come to your
location for the pick up,so about the payment which is   $3500, and willing
to offer you that amount but due to some issue i am out of cash right now so
that's why i decided to pass your data to my client in US who is owing some
amount worth $8000 which i will instruct him to send you the check in that
amount he ias owing me,i know the amount is more than the amount of the 1971
1A197H283628, cos a check sent here takes 30 days to clear while send from
U S clears within 3-4 days so i am willing to trust you with the excess fund
with you,So i want you to have it in mind that as soon as the check clears
you've have your own deduct while the balance send to me via western union
money transfer,mail me if the terms is been ! acceptable to you asap.if that
is ok and,! also send down your name and addres which you would receive the
payment waiting for your fruithful response. Thanks and
Regards .

Hello,
My name is Gibson and I am an automobile dealer. I usually buy cars from the US. and London and ship them to my customers at their various locations. I am currently based in Tunicia.
I am interested in your car and would like you to give me your selling price and indicate if you would accept payment by a cashiers check drawn from a US. bank. All other cost like shipping and handling charges would be taken care of by my Personal Assistant.
Thanks as I look forward to reading from you.

I am a car and bike dealer based in (united arab emirate) I
saw your advert placement at greateoldcars.com and am
interested in buying your car. Please forward me your
final asking price only as my client who is based in
the US. would handle the shipping and pick-up. Also
indicate if you would accept a cashiers cheque drawn
from a US. bank for payment. I look forward to reading
from you.

Thanks

So the bottom line is this folks, if it sounds too good to be true it
probably is, and just cover your ass out there, as there are a lot of clowns
wanting to separate you from your money. Oh, the figure I believe I heard
mentioned in the news report from these Nigerian scams was about 38 million
dollars, so I guess some fools are gullible enough to fall for it. That is
about as much money AMC spent to develop the Pacer in 1973-74 for release in 75.
King Edward Nhuru Stakes
Director and Propirt, propier, prope, peoprot, propetire,
owner operator grand poobah water buffalo
planet houston amx